Adoption Law Office

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Learning about adoption is a daunting task
There are so many factors to consider --- and each can change the total "cost." There are countless adoption websites, but which ones can you trust? If they're not trying to sell something, they're either all fluff and soft music, or there's so much information you can't make sense of it all. If you're just getting started, this website is for you. Our office has been devoted solely to adoption since January of 2003. We can help you understand how the process will work for you.

How Is Adoption Similar to Biological Parenthood?
After the adoption is final, adoptive parenthood should actually differ as little as possible from biological parenthood. But all parenting is more of an art than a science. Is it hard? Yes! Is it worth it? Yes!

How Is Adoption Different from Biological Parenthood?
Parenting an adopted child IS different, though. How? An illustration is probably better than any explanation we can offer, and a sterling example of the art of adoptive parenthood is this mother's story about adopting from China that appeared in the New York Times on May 13th, 2007. Read it. Love it. Live it. You won't be sorry.

Can A Good Adoption Plan Avoid Some of the Risks Biological Parents Face?
Nothing worthwhile comes without risk. And here too, adoption is "the same, but different." Obviously, each adoption involves some uncertainties, and most cause some emotional complexities for adoptees that are discussed elsewhere here. But adoption does involve many of the same risks and down sides for adoptive parents that biological parents face. The critical difference is this: The emotional journey that comes with pregnancy does not happen organically with adoption, and the stresses and strains of parenthood can pile up in different, and unexpected, places. Consider these stories reported in the May 22, 2008, Israeli newspaper Ha'aretz. Referred to there as "post-adoption blues," these stories illustrate the importance of thinking about the daily burdens of parenthood when making an adoption plan. The story notes that "post-adoption depression" is relatively rare, but it is crucial for both birth parents and pre-adoptive parents to think about the mundane, daily burdens of parenthood in deciding what is best for a child.

As a law office, we owe a fiduciary duty to our clients. Therefore, we must advise our clients:

Answering the Call of Parenting Makes You a Better Person
You know this in some sense already, but with adoption, we must emphasize that Parenting is not just a privilege --- it is a responsibility. Because while it is popular to say that "Our children are our future," remember that Our parenting is the future of our children. But efforts to become a better parent make you a better person too, so those efforts are doubly worthwhile.

Our Advice to You: Adoption Is About Parenting, Not Just Legalities or Fees
Engaging our office for your adoption plan is making us part of your adoption team, not just "outsourcing" the legal steps to the lawyer who quotes the lowest fee. Good parents look at several factors, not just the bottom line. Our mission is helping people who want to provide good parenting to children who need it. If your mission is to get the lowest possible legal fee, just be aware that if you hire the lawyer who quotes the lowest fee, you run the risk of getting less expertise than you need. But having said that, we should also emphasize that we make every effort to help families who cannot afford our regular fees, and there are several ways to address this problem. For more on this, call us, or see the Discussion of Legal Fees on our Legal Steps page.

WE PREFER THAT ADOPTIVE PARENTS SIGN OUR PARENTING PLEDGE
If our professional services are going to be involved in creating new adoptive parents for a child, we want the adoptive parents to make personal commitments to good parenting (which, remember, will help them be better people!). Therefore, we PREFER that our adoptive parents sign our "Pledge For Parents Entering Into An Adoptive Triad," and we ASK the birth parents to sign the Pledge as well. If the adults in an adoption plan make these pledges for the benefit of the children, those children will get the best parenting possible. There is more about the importance of our Pledge on our Emotions Page.

Also, we are a Georgia law firm. We can only represent Georgia clients, and Georgia law limits the role attorneys can play in adoption, but this site is meant to help anyone understand adoption in the U.S.

Representation outside of Chatham County will involve travel expenses, so you may want to call us for an attorney recommendation in your area if reducing those expenses is a priority.

The "Adoption Triad"
Adoption "matches" birth parents, and their children, with adoptive parents (these three groupings form what is known as the "adoption triad").

Already Have a Match?
If you are looking at adopting a stepchild, relative, or adult, or a child you've already identified (but isn't related to you), you already have a match. Your next step is getting Legal Help, and understanding the Emotional Adjustments you will face.

Historically, licensed adoption agencies (private and public) have dominated the process of finding adoptive matches. International adoption is virtually impossible without an agency. Domestically, some pre-adoptive parents are hesitant to get "invested" in one agency and possibly limit their ability to find other matches outside of that agency's efforts.

Georgians can also find a match directly (through friends, families, pastors, doctors, nurses and social workers in labor and delivery wings of hospitals, etc.). "Do-it-yourself" matching can be hard work in Georgia, but it gives you complete control over the process. You can also use piecemeal help from others:

An adoption "networker" helps pre-adoptive couples strike a happy medium between "do-it-yourself" matching and relying on just one agency. These charge a consultancy fee to help "market" pre-adoptive parents to agencies and birth parents, and they also help match them with agencies, facilitators or birth parents for particular placements.

Facilitators help put birth and adoptive parents together. (Be aware that facilitators in other states may use practices that are common there, but are illegal in states like Georgia. Many facilitators do a great job, but some charge for benefits they cannot deliver.)

As noted above, Georgia law limits the role attorneys can play in adoption. Georgia's statutory framework guards vigilantly against "baby-selling," and as a part of this strategy, Georgia lawyers cannot "place" a child in an adoptive home the way lawyers in other states do. Every state's law is different, but Georgia residents have to live with this rule. If a Georgia attorney promises to "get" a child for you, or asks you to pay a Georgia birth mother's living expenses, beware: One or both of you may be committing a felony.

The "Rule of Thumb" under Georgia Law:
First, some terminology: "Placing" a child for adoption means "selecting" an adoptive family to receive (adopt) a child. And here's the Georgia "rule of thumb": Only two types of Georgia "entities" can legally "place" a child for adoption: 1. licensed child-placing agencies, and 2. the child's legal parent(s). Non-licensed people, lawyers, pastors, doctors, nurses, social workers, whoever, can give personal, one-to-one assistance to those trying to make #2 happen, but we have to avoid doing things that really amount to #1.

No Right Method
As with finding a spouse, there are many ways to find a match; no one way is the "right" way. Every match has its own unique character.

Termination of Existing Rights to the Child
After a match is made, existing rights to the child must be legally terminated. Agencies usually handle this step in adoptions they arrange.

Finalization of Adoptive Parents' Rights
Adoptive parents have to finalize their legal rights in a court proceeding, even if they have used an agency, and most adoptive parents hire a lawyer to complete this step. Every adoption involves this legal cost.

Can Both Steps Be Done At One Time?
Yes, it can be done in independent adoptions (no agency involved), and it is usually done in certain types of adoption; see our Legal Steps page for details on what legal services are necessary for different types of adoption. We can handle one or both of adoption's steps for Georgia clients.

Hiring a Lawyer
Adoption is a private matter --- you may hope you can just use a friend or neighbor who happens to be a lawyer. But understand the risk of hiring a lawyer who isn't experienced and familiar with adoption and adoption law.

Do You HAVE to Hire a Lawyer?
You have a RIGHT to represent yourself in most legal proceedings; but it's risky. As just noted, it's also risky to use a lawyer who isn't experienced and familiar with adoption and adoption law. So it's doubly risky to do the legal steps of adoption without a lawyer if you don't know what you're doing. There's more on this below.

Getting the Big Picture
Most of our clients are finalizing their adoptions, but the earlier you contact us, the better we will be able to give you the big picture. Retaining us early in the process gives you earlier access to legal advice, and that fee is credited towards the finalization work that will be needed later anyway.

The Real "Planned Parenthood"
If there really is such a thing as "planned parenthood," it is adoption. Child birth isn't always planned, but adoption requires some serious planning. Dealing with this planning --- known as the "Paper Pregnancy" for pre-adoptive parents --- is the first emotional adjustment adoption demands. More on this below.

Adoption Lasts a Lifetime
All members of the triad will need to make emotional adjustments they hadn't anticipated. Most adoptive triads manage these well enough; but if ignored, they can become severe. This is listed third here because it usually comes third chronologically, but DO NOT make your adoption plan without considering these issues.

Address your emotional issues about infertility before embarking on adoption. Don't assume that adopting will "solve" the heartache associated with infertility. It will make you parents, yes, but it won't "undo" injuries you already have.

Divorce or Other Family Troubles
In stepparent and relative adoptions, divorce or other family troubles may have set the stage for adoption. Here again, adoption may indeed be the best strategy to use in seeking healing and moving forward, but it cannot alter the past. Those issues will need separate attention.

Problems That Lead Up to Adoption
The problems that lead to an adoption plan can hurt the affected children before the adoption and have repercussions afterwards too. Most adopted children have "lost" one or both parents in some sense, and that hurts, even if they have no personal recollections about it.

Agencies Can Help
Good adoption agency workers usually provide adequate counseling for the issues that arise before, and soon after, the adoption is finalized in court. Independent counselors can always be consulted, but you should seek out someone who has experience with adoption's peculiar dimensions. Good agency workers are often more aware of adoption's issues than independent counselors. Of course, long-term issues can only be addressed on a case-by-case basis.

Adoption's Roots Sink Into the Soul
The Living Trust Consecration Ceremony Mr. Bull developed helps address adoption's emotional issues from a Christian perspective. In any event, you should be aware that adoption's emotional issues can last a lifetime, particularly for the adoptee.

You Will Feel a Frustrating Lack of Control
Many get frustrated and impatient with the adoptive process. And many feel that the very procedures that are meant to safeguard the child are harming the child in other ways. Or they are generally hindering the whole adoption, and thus hurting, rather than helping, the child, or the family, or both. The trouble is: 1) the procedures really can't flex or change much from case to case, but 2) every case really IS different. So you can bet that the process will require some things that will seem to do more harm than good.

This Ain't "Mail-Order Birthing"
Pre-adoptive parents, don't kid yourselves: Adoption is not a "substitute" for biological birth in which one "buys" a child. It is tempting, especially in this day and age, to think of adoption as a "commodity," and that if you "get" an adoption (or even "part" of one) for $200 less than someone else, you got a better "deal." But choosing your adoption agency, or your adoption attorney, that way is like choosing a church by how often they pass the plate. It does involve expenses, yes, but adoption leads to parenting, and you cannot buy parenting. The real "bottom line" on adoption is this: If you are not ready to do the life-long, soul-searching, hard work of parenting, do not adopt.

The Law Is An A__, uh . . . , Well, A "Mule"!
Another problem here is that a contested adoption can expose a serious weakness about the law and the judicial system: They can be quite clumsy. Reason: One size DOESN'T fit all. Life gives us all splinters from time to time, but taking them out with the judicial system is going to be like using a hammer instead of tweezers. If that's what it takes, OK, but it's not going to be pretty. (These days, too few lawyers even recognize this, and of those, many either don't want to admit it, or hesitate to advise their clients about it, but it's a lesson we should all learn a little better.) See our warning about contested adoptions here.

Compare Adoptive Parenthood to Biological Parenthood
The differences between adoptive and biological parenthood can easily seem unfair and unnecessarily difficult. Unexpected problems will crop up, at the wrong times and the wrong places. But remember: Not all biological births go as planned, either, and parents take on previously unforeseen parental burdens all the time. If you gave birth to a child with medical problems, you wouldn't just leave the child at the hospital because of those problems. Moreover, suppose someone gave you a child to place in a good, adoptive home --- would you just give the child to the next family who asked? No. Remember that ALL parenthood involves unexpected risks. All we can do is prepare for them. Plan for the best, prepare for the worst, and expect the unexpected. (For a great example, read this story of some clients of ours, and how they answered the call of an unexpected risk in their adoption --- with strength they didn't realize they had until they needed it.)

Learn What You Want, Work Towards That Goal
To prepare for adoption, both birth and adoptive parents should learn about all the issues affecting their search for a match and the emotional complexities of adoption. Set priorities, make a plan, and see that plan through. Opportunities can pop up, and some truly are "meant to be." But like anything else, most successful adoptions don't just happen; someone makes them happen. That "someone" should be you.

Knowledge Gives You Some Control
This may sound odd coming from a lawyer, but don't just "leave it to the professionals." There are plenty of people in this field who will promise you the moon --- then send you an astronomical bill --- with a separate charge for "lunar shipping and handling." Learn about the services you need, what those services should cost, and who can deliver them with understanding and respect not only for you and your plan, but for everyone involved in your adoption.

Know the Legal Issues
Avoid the heartaches, headaches, and expenses of a legally fouled-up adoption by learning about the legal issues in your adoption. Birth parents want to be assured of their children's legal status. And pre-adoptive parents have to avoid certain traps or they can become legally ineligible to adopt, ever. Knowledgeable legal help can insure that your adoption plan complies with all the potentially complex legal questions involved in finding a match.

Know the Emotional Issues
Also of critical importance for birth and adoptive parents is the emotional complexity of adoption. What you don't know can hurt you. Poor planning or ignorance can cause painful surprises, disappointments, and disillusionments for all involved.

Parenting Is Always a Risk
Remember that all parenthood is an adventure through uncharted territory. No one can eliminate every parental risk. But you can learn what risks you may face, and you can make plans to deal with them. So take charge of your adoption: Plan for the best, prepare for the worst, expect the unexpected. Learn as much as you can, set your priorities, map out a plan, and stick to it. The pages described below should help.

Adoption IS the choice you can live with, but if you're just getting started learning about it, it's hard to know where to start. The Internet does have much of what you need, but it will confuse and overwhelm you. Most adoption websites have either too much sentiment and not enough information, or too much information and not enough help making sense of it all. Let the Internet be a tool, not a tyrant: Keep your focus on what you need for educating yourself, making your adoption plan, and sticking to it.

The need for adoption IS great (thus the title of the website), but the cost can easily get to be great, too. Finding good homes for children doesn't happen by itself -- it takes effort, and someone has to pay for that.

Unfortunately, there are people "on the take" in the adoption business, both domestically and internationally. That may be too harsh an assessment of some of them --- they would answer that they're just running a business. Your mileage may vary, and some schemes are only "scams" in the eyes of the beholder, but when people start talking about "helping children," there's no telling what might happen.

This site describes adoption as blending factors in Three Major Categories, but you can't tackle them one at a time. You need to understand them all before you do anything. Once you do that, all you can do is your best. Keep the big picture in mind and you should do just fine. Here's how to get started on your adoption plan:

The First Category:
The Finding a Match page walks you through what will become the early steps of your adoption plan. It also includes some general information about adoption and the applicable laws and procedures in Georgia that will impact your search for a match. Since Georgia lawyers cannot "place" a child with a family, Finding a Match is something you, and God, must do. What we can do is help you learn about, plan, and finalize your adoption. Every case is different of course, but this page will give you an idea of some of the common issues you will face.

The Second Category:
Before taking any Legal Steps, go to the Emotional Adjustments page for a look at adoption's emotional complexities and how adoption practices have adjusted recently to meet the emotional needs of everyone involved. Once considered a shameful secret (designed primarily to cover up adult failings), adoption today is instead a win/win/win solution focused on the child's best interests. Understanding adoption's emotional dimensions can be hard, so CONSIDER THESE ISSUES BEFORE TAKING ACTION ON YOUR ADOPTION PLAN! Also included on this page is information on the Living Trust Consecration Ceremony, developed to recognize the value of adoption in a Christian setting.

The Third Category:
The Legal Steps page explains what factors will affect the legal fees and expenses involved, and the length of the process; it discusses how to get your legal data to us; and it lists the documents you will need to copy. (The same list is included in the Downloadable Legal Steps Form, and it will also come up afterwards for copying and printing if you use the Web-Based Legal Steps Form on the Forms & Resource Guide page).

Guidance and Help with ALL the Categories:
The Forms & Resource Guide page does several things. First, it gives you multiple ways to send your legal data to us so we can prepare the papers you will need. But since you have to consider factors in Three Major Categories for your adoption plan, the Forms & Resource Guide page also includes a lengthy GUIDE TO OTHER RESOURCES section. This section will help organize your adoption-related searches for other services on the Internet, suggest some helpful resources, and give you some benchmarks to guide your own searches and evaluate what will fit your needs. Internet searches on "adoption" produce torrents of information, most of unknown reliability. Having some specific goals and requirements in mind will help you find more than confusion and frustration.

Retaining a Lawyer
Retaining a lawyer is a private matter, and adoption is an affair of the heart. Many instinctively hope they can hire a friend, neighbor, or family member who happens to be a lawyer, ... or a lawyer they've already used for something else, ... or even that they can do it themselves without a lawyer. That's understandable. But you need more than someone who understands you. You need someone with experience and familiarity with adoption and adoption law. And consider this:

YOU CANNOT INSURE AGAINST YOUR OWN LEGAL MALPRACTICE!
If you do it by yourself, and you do something wrong --- even innocently --- that causes you significant damage, you won't have any insurance to cover the damage. If you hire a competent lawyer, not only will such mistakes be less likely, but if they occur, there will be insurance coverage for your damage. (Granted, you want results instead of "compensation" for failure; but if something does go wrong, any compensation is better than nothing.)

But CAN You Do It Yourself Without a Lawyer?
Sure you can . . . in fact, it's your legal right. But like any complex, important job you try to do yourself, you could pour a lot of time and money into it, only to find that you can't finish it, or that you've made mistakes (some temporary, some permanent) that you couldn't have foreseen. There are some things that could be very serious if you don't get them right, and there are a lot of lesser details that almost certainly won't be as good as they could be. Moreover, if you do not hire a competent attorney to assist you, you will probably never know how much better your case could have been. If you work at it hard enough, and find the help you need, it may work out fine. But if you hire an attorney with experience and commitment on adoption's unique issues and its increasingly complex laws, you won't have to worry about what you don't know.

Can You Hire a Lawyer to TEACH You How to Do It By Yourself?
When we started doing adoptions exclusively, we had high hopes for this --- it seemed like a "win/win" idea. But adoption is more complex than most people realize, and it quickly became clear that it wouldn't work at all. By the time you pay an attorney to "teach" you how to do it, you wouldn't really save any money, and we wouldn't really save any time. And, if anything went wrong, guess whose malpractice insurance would be asked to pay? If we can't offer any savings, and we're going to be responsible for the outcome anyway, this "win/win" idea turns out to be a "lose/lose" proposition.

Adoption is a Specialized Area of Law Practice
These days, law practice (like medical practice) is getting more and more specialized. Many lawyers don't realize how complex adoption has gotten unless it is a focus of their practice. They think all adoptions are simple, and similar. Neither is true, and our office frequently gets calls from other lawyers who are unsure of how to proceed with an adoption they wish they hadn't agreed to do for a friend!

Beware of Low Initial Quotes for Legal Fees
Most adoptions will have at least one complication that unfamiliar lawyers won't include in their original fee quote. And something like interstate adoption is extremely risky for lawyers who don't have experience with it. Be on guard if an attorney quotes a wonderfully low fee without asking knowledgeable, probing, and detailed questions about your situation and goals: You'll probably have to pay more later (financially, legally, or emotionally; perhaps all three).

If Your Adoption Is Covered by the Hague Convention:
YOU DO NOT NEED TO TAKE ANY FURTHER LEGAL ACTION. Adoptions from countries that are participants in the Hague Convention are automatically binding on United States courts. (This is why non-Hague adoptions must be "completed" via "re-adoption" or "finalization" --- to make them binding on U.S. courts.) Click to this newish federal site to see if your child's country is a member country. (The site doesn't play well with all browsers, but it seems to be the best site around for international adoption if you hunt through it.)

Should International Adopters Do Their Own U.S. Finalization?
If you do need to finalize your international adoption, the international adoption agencies have seemed especially anxious to tell their clients they could do the domestic finalization process without an attorney. After guiding parents through all of the tedious and difficult immigration laws of two countries, and the foreign legal procedures, they want to be able to offer them something that is easy and inexpensive. "It's as easy as signing a piece of paper," one reportedly said. Well again, you can do it yourself, but if it were that easy . . . if just filling in some forms would work for every case . . . they would give you those forms along with all the other papers and services they provide. Unfortunately, it's not that easy: Every case is different, every country is different, and every county in Georgia has different procedures. And technically, advice on how to do an adoption is "practicing law" --- something only a lawyer is licensed (and insured) to do.

Get Advice Before Traveling
There are things you should know about Georgia's international adoption law before you travel. So don't wait till you get home with your new child to start thinking about this "easier" part of the process.

All We Do Is Adoption
Family (re)building is the exclusive focus of our law practice. Whether you want to adopt (private, public, international, stepchild, or relative) or place a child for adoption, Mr. Bull has worked on positive solutions to problem pregnancies since 1992, our staff includes an active member of a Catholic Order to assist in our ministry, Sister Mary Ann Lang, and we can counsel you throughout the process. We offer help with your adoption plan, advice on other services that will fit your plan, representation in court, ... everything you need to keep your focus on the big picture. Our office is independent, so your interests will come first.

Living Trust Consecration Ceremony
Mr. Bull has even developed a Christian ceremony to consecrate an adoption. Working with your church, he can arrange and/or direct the Living Trust Consecration, a ceremony of scripture verses and prayers that will bless and affirm the adoptive entrustment of your child.

We Are Computer-Savvy! (Don't Tell Anyone!)
If you like your lawyers "computer-savvy," Mr. Bull admits to the "nerd factor" of being computer-literate (he wrote and maintains this website, for example). On the one hand, this keeps our costs down, but at the same time, it limits our ability to provide as much personalized service as we'd like. Nothing in life is perfect, is it?

Call to Discuss Your Case
Of course, no lawyer can put the advice YOU need on a website. We can only give personal attention to clients. So feel free to call us at 912-Adopt-Need (912-236-7863), and speak to Sister Mary Ann Lang, or Mr. Bull, or send us an e-mail.

skip the paid ads, click a link, then use Ctrl+F from there!) The information on this site is general information only, not formal legal advice.
Neither this site, nor submission of information through this site, forms a lawyer/client relationship.